Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Goodbye Bill. And thank you.

it has been a very sad weekend around our home. Sweet Snickerdoodle got a phone call on Saturday night that her BFF had died unexpectedly. He lived in Hawaii and they had never met in person but, as you all know, friendship is not limited by distance, especially in this day and age. She was planning to go out there after graduation next summer and spend some time. I wish I could afford for her to go to the funeral, but that is just not available. But we'll figure out a way for her to get out there next summer if I have to sell one of the other kids ;).

Bill had Crohn's Disease. http://digestive.niddk.nih.gov/ddiseases/pubs/crohns/ In and of itself, it is not fatal. But he had a flare-up this summer and was on several medications. The medications were masking the symptoms of a bacterial infection that was undetected until Friday. He had gone to his first two days of college, then was sick for 2 weeks. He thought he had the flu. Bill went to the doctor on Friday and that is when they found the infection. My guess is that by that time it had infiltrated his bloodstream and it caused cardiac arrest sometime later. They put him on life support and I am guessing that they disconnected it Saturday morning. As I said, those are guesses from what she has said.

Snickerdoodle is absolutely devastated. Today was her first day of school as a senior, and she couldn't enjoy it and came home at lunch. The pain in her heart and soul is visible and visceral. And we cannot do anything to make it better.

As parents, the time eventually comes when  you cannot make it better with a kiss, a hug and a Happy Meal. All you can do is stand by with a box or two of tissues and open arms.You can cry with them, ache for them, but in the end all you can do is be there for them. But she is grieving, and that is good. She's grieving for the future too...for the years of friendship that were taken from them. For herself since he is no longer on the other end of the phone line or the computer.

Bill, thank you for being my daughter's dearest friend. Thank you for being a virtual shoulder for her to cry on, talk to and laugh with.Thank you for 'getting' her. Thank you for being her joyful companion the last few years, in good times and in bad. Thank you for helping her along the way. I am so sorry that we'll never get to meet you, welcome you into our home and have another kid around. You will always have a special place in her heart and memories, and you will always have a place in my heart also...just for what you gave to her.


  1. So sorry to hear this. It hurts so to see our "babies" hurt. xoxo

  2. I am so sorry for your daughter's loss of a good friend. I am dreading when my babies have their hearts broken like this, and have no idea how I would handle it as a parent. Thanks for writing about your experience to share with the rest of us.(I loved the happy meal line and how it can fix anything. It so expresses where I am right now with my youngins!!!)

  3. As we say in the South, bless her heart. She can't see it now, but she will grow so much from this. You are doing exactly what she needs right now. Praying for her!

  4. So very very sorry.
    In prayer,

    Tales from Bloggeritaville


Please leave comments, good, bad or indifferent. I love reading them.