Saturday, July 18, 2009

Shhhhhh! He's trying to kill me!

Cabinet Man and Snickerdoodle left for Denver on Wednesday afternoon to lay a hardwood floor. Entire first floor. They'll be home on Tuesday. CalebTheDog's favorite two people are gone.

Thursday I was going up the stairs and Caleb raced me to the top. When I was on the 2nd from the top stair, he reared up and tried to jump on me. He's not allowed to jump, so this was an obvious attempt to kill me under the guise of playfulness. He was fussed at. All was fine for a few hours and then...I was coming down the stairs and he was lying on the stairs, sprawled across them so he could watch for the "Master" to come home. I tried to nudge him out of the way. When he didn't move, I went to step over him and he stood up. Again, an attempt to trip me.

He thinks I don't suspect him, but I do. I was sitting in the chair watching TV and he was lying in the floor. I went to put my feet down and stand up and he was rightthereundermyfeet. Another subtle attempt to trip me.

Last night I was coming out of the lighted bedroom into a darker hallway and he'd left his slobber chewy there...misstep which could easily have led to me falling and hitting my head on something.

The final straw came immediately afterwards when I was heading down the stairs and he rushed past me to fling himself down the stairs. ANOTHER attempt on my life. I called Cabinet Man and told him that if he comes home on Tuesday and finds my lifeless body at the foot of the stairs, and Caleb is standing over me with his slobber chewy in his moth...he'll know what happened. I have walked him, throw that stinkin' chewy for him, walked him to the park and throw his tennis ball until he was too tired to chase it. Made sure his water bowl is full with clean water, fed him...washed his bedding and this is how he repays me? Attempted murder.

Look at that face. Sooooo flippin' innocent...

CalebtheDog

Cabinet Man laughed and said that oddly enough, he could see Caleb standing over me with an expression that says, 'What?!"

If you don't hear from me for a week or so, and the story of a 'freak' accident makes the rounds on the 'net...you'll know the truth. Please do not let me go unmourned....



Another pic of the murderous thug.

2 comments:

  1. Clearly he is out to get you. He must think you did something nefarious to his 2 favorite people. Keep your cell phone handy in case you fall and can't get up.

    ReplyDelete
  2. How funny!! I am SURE it was just an accident, he is really just trying to "bond" with you and is maybe a little too zealous!

    Be careful though....just in case

    Lou Cinda :)

    ReplyDelete

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